Sunday, March 11, 2012
Okay, so yesterday I was rendered speechless for the first time in a verrah long time. Shocked? Yeah, me too.
One of my pre-readers came over to read Nexus, the third and final installment in the Supernova Saga - in case you haven't been following along - and I heard her yelling indiscernible things from the other end of the house. So, I rush in and ask what's the matter.
She's crying. Full on sobbing, wiping her eyes with her shirt, putting up a hand and asking for a moment, crying. O.0
"This is the best f*cking book I've ever read!" she says. "And I've read a LOT of books! Just hug me..."
Again with the O.0
After I nearly smother to death from her death grip of a hug - the kind your aunt with the bright pink lipstick lays on you - I finally get the feeling back in my arms, and she MAKES me call two other pre-readers because she simply must discuss it with them right away.
Now, let me tell you that I've been damn nervous about this book because I took it "there." What is "there," you ask? Um, I'm not sure how to describe it without giving the book away, but let's say I question things we've been taught. *stuttered breath*
BTW, she was stuttering breaths as well. <--- I shit you not.
Several long sighs later to expel the abundance of emotions I (through the story) had slammed into her chest, she was finally semi-coherent. I, on the other hand, was not. I sat stoic, just listening as if it was an out of body experience or something. Really, I was shocked and didn't know what to say, but I gathered this was a good thing.
I keep telling my pre-readers that they're biased because they're so close to the story, but they insist they are not to the point that they're insulted I won't take their word for it that it's good (I think they used a different word here, but I don't want to sound like I'm bragging). After all, isn't that why I have them as pre-readers to begin with? They have a point, but I'm still one who doubts herself. *another shock for you, I'm sure* I'm pretty sure this is a pre-requisite for all "artists", no? <--- Lookie, I called myself an artist. That shows some improvement, does it not?
Anywho ... I'm feeling better about Nexus. Especially since it only took me something like three re-writes, a severe bout with writer's block, and a slight emotional breakdown to get it where it is. Now, it will be up to the editing team at the PH to decide if it was all for naught.
My goal with this book? To yank those emotions outside of your heart and then slam them back in with a fierce "how you like me now?", followed up by the tightest hug you've ever been given, virtual or in person. Because I'm feelin' it, too - I need that hug just as much. Admittedly, it drained me to the point that I haven't gone back to read back over it as of yet, and I'm dreading it because I know...
These characters laid it all out on the line, bare-assed nekked, and I'm so very grateful they chose me, even if it has affected my life and how I view it so profoundly. Perhaps I should take a trip to some Tibetan Monastery to reflect on things for a bit? Perhaps...but not until the edits are done and I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. Dominic, Kerrigan, Gabe, Colton, Drew, Sinclair, Tori, and especially Dante ... Thank you for opening my eyes and my heart.