Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Jack CL's Style Winner!!!
Guess what today is ... That's right, RELEASE DAY!!!!
In honor of today, and because I'm crazy busy, I ran a contest for my street team, Parker's Pimpin' Posse, to be able to Jack CL's Style and blog. The following is the winning post from Nikki Thomson.
Pulling up on my vintage Harley, I kill the engine before approaching the podium, gently pushing CL Parker out of the way.
What is up my crazy ass, sassy beotches?!? I am here to give our divalicious CL Parker a bit of a break. What, with her working the streets so hard these days, her sweet cheeks are whipped!! No! I don’t mean that way! Sheesh! I mean working with her Street TEAM! You know, for the imminent release of her new book? And there is a porntastic amount of RELEASE to be had!!! Wait, whaddya mean who am I and what am I talking about?? Whoa..whoa…WHOA! Lemme back this bus up a few stops then.
My name is Dez and my best friend is Lanie Talbot. Well, I kinda like her and shit, so I guess that makes her my best babe.
And she’s one of the most selfless people I have ever met.
And then, of course, there is Noah Crawford ...
And that’s all I’m gonna say ‘bout him for now.
And throughout it all, this is what happened to both CL and Lanie, at least as I saw it.
I mean, for reals, this guy danced them both around a bit. And so CL, who is normally like this
Was suddenly like this
But then a wicked funny thing happened…
And then this…
And before you know it, my best babe was hooked, like BIG TIME.
And this was about the time I stopped watching. Ok, maybe I peeked, through my fingers, once or twice.
I mean, could you really blame me? He IS a specimen, even if I think he’s an ass.
But, despite my warnings, there was a lot of that. As in, tons. Often and repeatedly. So naturally, there was a lot of this…
And if you think that is bad, you should see what CL looks like!
And then there was some of this too….
And I think even Lanie was caught!
So, there you have it. The natural progression of the creator and her creation in A Million Dirty Secrets. And oh, don’t worry. You’ll get some more of me in the next round, A Million Guilty Pleasures. Cuz I love ya and shit. J